2/27/14

That's love

2/26/14

Back at Pier 1

2/25/14

One of my fav pics from a commercial set.

2/24/14

My cheesecakes made a debut at La P'tite Framboise in Port Washington, NY!! Hope you like them!!

Cranberries

I was driving to the restaurant on Thursday and was looking for my Killers cd when I found this one. I popped it in and at first I got stupid happy at the fact that it would work and then I started balling, Hysterical. I had to pull over.
Ive literally had this cd since 1994. I took it with me everywhere, so today its not in the greatest shape. This cd was the anthem of this one whole summer... I remember it being romantically (not like sex or kissing, but just the vibe) and emotional and stimulating. Granted I am a stupid hopeless romantic that believes way too much in the idea of true love. But it was this summer I remember the most, the last summer of innocence, but some how thinking I owned the world, sitting in the electric tree at averill while the sun slowly faded into the twilight color and the lightning bugs started popping up, smelling the scent of summer.  I wish there was a way to get you to see what I remember. At the time, I had no idea, but this was the summer of summers, the best summer I'll ever have and I strongly believe for the rest of my life.
Whenever I think of summer as a whole, its that summer that rushes to me and makes me feel alive again. the smell, feel, the amazingness of it all - I wish i could feel like that all again.

2/22/14

My happy place was very crowded today...

2/21/14

Here is my best friend, someone I have loved for countless years and was always afraid to lose. 

2/20/14

Sometimes I'm so glad he's a dog, and not actually a 7 yr old...

2/19/14

 Poor Louie, misses his momma

2/18/14

Lol typical Italian 

2/17/14

I was either 1 or 2 years old 

2/15/14

Crazy Icicles on my neighbors house...

2/16/15

Holding his piggy, watching tv 

2/14/14

My new bracelet❤️

2/13/14

Buddy the bearded dragon.

2/12/14

Happy Birthday Baby Bro!!

2/11/14

2/10/14

2/9/13

This is going to be an insane wedding!!

2/8/14

Made some valentines day cookies!

2/7/14

After a long day of playing, eating cake, going to the pet store and getting treats, this birthday boy is wiped out!

Happy Birthday Baby Boy!!

A few years back I was taking a public speaking class and had to write a piece that celebrated something in my life:

                                                                                My Baxter

When he was just a baby, I picked him up & held him in my arms. He rested his head on my chest, nuzzled his nose into that small space between my chin and shoulder and fell asleep. At that moment, my heart absolutely melted, and I felt more love for this little guy than I have for any person I’ve ever known. Little did I know that this little guy not only stole my heart, but truly changed my life. 

Before I met Baxter, I was never much of a dog person. I liked puppies, they were cute and cuddly but like a child, once I had my fill, I was more than willing to give it back to the owner.  Even adult dogs, like older children, I had no enjoyment with.  I would much rather watch and smile than have to pet or play with it. Then I met Baxter and my world completely changed.

At the time my boyfriend Brian and I had been living together.  When the conversation of getting a dog came about I had a lot of rules: No dogs in the bed, no dogs on the couch, the dog must stay in one room and not venture to other parts of the house, we’ll have scheduled times of when to take it out and so on.  The following day, I had a very bad day at work and instead of going home; I decided to visit the pet store, that’s where I met him.  Baxter was behind one of those glass caged walls, the kind where you can see them but can’t touch them. The second I saw him, I thought he was soo handsome; walked over, crouched down and immediately he started pawing at the glass. I knew right away that Brian had to meet him.

I continued to visit the pet store every day for 2 weeks, just to see him and to kinda make sure he was still there. It had come to the point that he started to recognize me as soon as I walked into the store. When I would approach the cage, he would jump around. He was so happy to see me.  The store manager stopped allowing me to play with him, saying it wasn’t fair and that only interested buyers were allow to play with the dogs several times a week. I knew I had to have him, that I needed him. Ive never needed to have something before; this was a completely new and weird feeling. But I knew I needed him.  I brought Brian in that night to meet him and he agreed to get him. After a long and exhausting process in which we almost lost him, Brian and I finally came up with enough money to buy him.

It’s been 4 years, Brian has come and gone, but Baxter and I are still a team. He’s my baby and I’m his mama; he sleeps in my bed, sits with me on the couch, has full access to my apartment and even shares my dinner. The two of us have been through so much together, like moving, boyfriends, break –ins; that I truly wonder what my life was like before him, I simply cannot remember. I sometimes wonder if he’s a person trapped in a dogs body, Sounds crazy – I know! He and I are just so connected it seems like that’s the only possible reason. When Im upset, he comes and snuggles with me; when I’m scared, he stands guard protecting me and when I’m happy, he is too.  Baxter is the best thing to ever happen to me. OH and like dogs, I like kids now too.

2/6/14

2/5/14

My job today is to sit here and hold his bone while he chews on it, as you can see he's holding onto me to make sure I don't get up and leave. 

2/4/14

a lot of thoughts floating around my head today. Trying to positively deal with everything and yet most is not positive at all.

If you are constantly seeking attention and the feeling of being needed from every where but here, you'll always have one foot outside the door. If one foots always outside the door, than you can never fully commit, nor allow yourself to fully love the person you are with. And if you can't fully love and appreciate your partner, than whats the point? 

"When your world seems to be falling apart, it may in fact be coming together"

My gut instinct is telling me to be weary, it has always been right before, not going to start doubting it now.

2/2/14 - Fingers crossed, maybe one day

I hope to one day have someone love me like this....

(Never Stop by Safety Suit)

This is my love song to you
Let every woman know I’m yours
So you can fall asleep each night, babe
And know I’m dreaming of you more

You’re always hoping that we make it
You always want to keep my gaze
Well you’re the only one I see
And that’s the one thing that won’t change

And with this love song to you
It’s not a momentary phase
You are my life, I don’t deserve you
But you love me just the same
And as the mirror says we’re older
I will not look the other way
You are my life, my love, my only
And that’s the one thing that won’t change

I’ll never stop trying
I’ll never stop watching as you leave
I’ll never stop losing my breath
Every time I see you looking back at me
I’ll never stop holding your hand
I’ll never stop opening your door
I’ll never stop choosing you babe
I’ll never get used to you

Still get my heart racing (you)
Still get my heart racing (for you)
Still get my heart racing (you)
Still get my heart racing (for you)

2/3/14

Super Bowl NYC! 

blah - 2/1/14

Looking for a sign, a symbol, something... I dont know what to do anymore and I have no idea where to go or what to do.  Not sure if I'm too busy starring at a closed door to notice the open one, or am I stuck in doorless room.

Its very fitting for pandora to play Hurt by Johnny Cash...its one of my favorites.

               "..What have I become, My sweetest friend, everyone I know, goes away, in the end. And you                          could have it all, my empire of dirt, I will let you down, I will make you hurt..."

Photo is from 99percentinvisible.org 

1/31/14